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ADOPT
A PENGUIN |
_____________ HELP SAVE PENGUINS - Your Number 1 Source of Penguin News Stories Home News Archives Global Warming Due to Penguin Gases -- Jan 2007 By Andy Lee A local scientist today, Dr. N. Ubsalot revealed his lifelong research into the problem of global warming and the sea levels rising. “To put it in layman’s terms, penguins are mating on the ice, and the friction is so great that they are melting the ice caps. Combine this with the output from their extensive mining facilities, and continued use of unrefined fossil fuels such as fish, it is obvious that they, not car emissions are the main cause for global warming.” When asked what to do as a solution, Dr Ubsalot came back with a simple answer “What we must do, as a human race, is learn the language of the penguins. When we achieve this, we must sneak into their habitats, and place rockets under their eggs. When they are mating, we ignite these rockets, but only to half thrust. This will distract those who are mating to look at their eggs. When they are directly over their eggs, finding out what is wrong, we place these thrusters at full power. These eggs now take off with all the power if bullets, in effect killing all adult penguins that have children. They will then continue into the upper stratosphere, then explode. When these eggs explode, they cover the low area of the stratosphere with clouds of blood. These clouds block out the sun for a small amount of time, therefore allowing the ice caps to expand, and negating the effects of all their previous efforts to destroy the world.” This reporter found this theory to make extreme common sense, and is now on disc 4 of “penguin for dummys”.
International crisis solved. Funny
how penguins can make AND break your day, no Andy Lee
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